Happy Halloween you spooky people!

The day where we can all act like four year olds and pretend we are someone completely different than ourselves.

That’s why some of my friends and I went as slutty waitresses this year!

we’re quite conservative

(Wait, is that the bowtie she always speaks of?) True, my quick friends, it is, and this is what I did for my Halloween.

I want to say it’s one of the first years I didn’t even think very hard of a costume idea.  I’m not mad, either.  Last Friday, when plenty of scary costume parties were taking place, I was at a wedding (kind of dressed like a leopard!). The following day I worked until midnight, and on my way home I saw so many lines outside of so many bars and I couldn’t help but think, Amen and Hallelujah that isn’t me.

I like Halloween, don’t get me wrong.  My favorite costume of all time included enormous fairy wings that I thought were hysterical as they smacked people in the face whilst I tried to walk through a packed bar.  Another golden idea was two yars ago when I dressed as KE$HA and basically just had to rat my hair to no end, not shower, sprinkle five pounds of glitter on myself, draw on my face, and carry a toothbrush and a bottle of Jack Daniels around all night.  Not all that bad.

This year was subdued, and quite frankly, I loved it.

As I walked to my car last night after a shift where absolutely nothing happened, I walked passed three girls who were in underwear and some sort of girdle to put their cans where their necks were supposed to be.

“Ow!” was my response, and they most certainly thought it was condescending.

It wasn’t meant to be, but if you’re going to have that quick of a negative reaction from what had to have been one of your first viewers of the night you’re either a.) too sensitive or b.) you know you’re not wearing enough clothes and are secretly judging yourself with every step you take.

I don’t get too worked up or feministic about the slutty outfits.  Like I said, it’s a day for everyone to venture out of their normal attire and behavior and act as someone or something completely different, and it’s publicly acceptable, so why not spend the evening as a dirty pirate hooker!?

I may have chosen to forgo this year’s Halloween festivities, but maybe I’ll pick out a random day in November to celebrate instead.  I’ll dress up as a dirty pirate hooker and everyone will be like, “What the shit is she wearing?!” and then I’ll probably get arrested, but the joke will be on all of you! Muahahaha!

….I should probably think that idea over a bit more.

I hope you all received more treats than tricks!

Cheers!