That time I cussed out the groom’s father (and other wedding tales)

This weekend was one for the books (or blogs).

The skies were clear, the sun was out, and the fall colors were so, so perfect.

The bride looked knock out sexy and the groom cleaned up pretty well too!  Her natural calm tendencies that I wrote about previously, however, did not kick in, and before she walked down the aisle she was praying she would not pass out or barf everywhere.

She did not do either of those things.  The ceremony was rad, beautiful and touching and alas, it was time for the trolley ride.  We took a quick stop at a colorful field, frolicked through it and snapped a couple photos before heading downtown to drive through the massive crowds flooding the streets of Grand Rapids for Art Prize. We literally spent a good chunk of time driving through the masses shouting things like, “Hurray for marriage!”  “They got married today! Cheer for them!” “Hurray for love! Makeout!”  We were so annoying, but dang, it was fun.

Even the speeches went smoothly and finally we could all throw a few back and dance our little booties off, which we definitely did.

When the reception was over, the bride wanted to visit one of her favorite little hole in the wall bars, so even though most of us did not need a tall beer, we headed over that way.  I was walking with a couple of friends when an SUV pulled up beside us and the driver asked, “Need a ride?”

Unaware and a bit caught off guard I yelled, “F off mother f-er!” (I am not one to be messed with, apparantly).

Yes, it was the groom’s very kind, generous, conservative, good Christian father, offering us a ride to the bar to ensure we arrived safely.

We all clamored in and I apologized probably way too many times.

He replied with (thank the heavens above), “I hope my girls respond like that if a random car tries to pick them up!”

I am guessing that most people would just run away or something.  My best friend is certain that some day my lack of filter will get me shot.

It was a really great night, and now my best friend is married to a fantastic man that has my approval. 

Time to don the bow tie, yet again.

To not cursing out people who are really nice,


One thought on “That time I cussed out the groom’s father (and other wedding tales)

  1. That very nice, conservative, christian, man is also a very good friend! Bite your tongue next time and bite it hard!! I knew I should have taken you myself!! 🙂 but I think I might have been the one that told you to go walk with your friends. My fault. Sorry!!


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